He feels a touch.

Once again, we are quoting from the world of freshman composition. The world that brings so much wisdom to us, not to mention hours of enjoyable reading. Sometimes you just have to wonder what they are thinking. A student wrote a paper about every geek's dream. That's right, it was about a girl, a real girl, not an inflatable girl, talking to him. He used the words "fire" and "neurons" in most of the sentences in what can only be described as interchangeable. Why am I telling you this you might ask? Well, I have said it once and I will say it again--they are the future of our country and one day they will be using us for fuel. "Soylent Green" is people!!! That's right, they have reduced me to quoting Charlton Heston. Oh what dark times are these...

On my last post, someone commented annonymously. At first, I thought it was my friend Shelly cause she called me Gimpy during my last surgery. But I noticed she had already posted a comment. Then I thought maybe Julie because just the day before we had been talking about the "if I won a million dollars." But then I decided that she would not say "Love Ya." So now, I am left to wonder. And you know that I tend to be a bit paranoid. So, if you are out there, I can't guess who. Please fess up. I can't tell you how many times I have had the million dollar discussion--let's face it, we all have it with all of our friends. Besides, if I know who you are, I might have something good to say about you.

I guess that I shall close here for today. I am running out of things to say the closer it gets to 5 pm.

I think it is just your jammy's...

At least that is what I think she said at 11pm after shoulder surgery. Of course, I was on a lot of pain meds. After all, I had a Mumfords Acromioplasty at 3:30 that afternoon. That is where they take out part of the clavical (1/4 inch off the end) and take a bone spur off the shoulder. Well, it wasn't the p.j.s. I developed an allergic reaction to Hydrocodone. After all I have done for that medicine, the many surgeries, mini-freakouts followed by the obligatory stress headache, not to mention all of the times they could not find my appendix but sent me home with meds anyway. You would have thought it would have treated me better. But hives in the middle of the night, that is just cruel. Luckily, my knight in shining armour (Phil) valiantly called the dr and promptly got me another prescription. Darvocet to the rescue.
I know you are wondering where I have been. Well, in the days preceeding the surgery it very difficult to type so this just sort of fell to the wayside as I tried to keep up with my job. And any of you who know me, know how hard and demanding my job can be. I mean only last friday, I only had a two hour lunch and the UC was out of donuts. Can you imagine the horrors that I face one a daily basis?
Alot has been going on lately. Phil and I celebrated our 14th anniversary on Jan 15. I was just chatting with a stoodent and I said that 14 years ago I was moving to Phoenix and she asked if I had ever moved back. I didn't know what to say so I said no, I still live there. Then she asked if I commuted everyday. When I responded Phoenix Arizona, she just say ya. She needs to be an entry in my upcoming book "There is no shame in not going to college." Of course that will be after my prize winning self help book "Husbands: The Real Baby of the Family." I used a colon so that it would sound scholarly and you are welcome. Another student ask if she could pass a class without taking it. I said no you pretty much have to take classes to pass them and she just looked confused. But then she left and that is all I really care about.
Yesterday, I wrote my prospectus--well really it is just a prosp cause it isn't complete enough to get the whole word. Then I sent it to the chair of my committee and I forgot to attach it to the email, so I guess that I really did not send it. I thought that was just about perfect. I hope that this does not foreshadow the up coming thesis hill that I must climb, minus my own sherpa!!
Well, I shall close here for the day. I am sorry that so many of you have felt the pain of my absence, but each new day brings new hope.
P.S. I am sorry for any errors you find.

My long awaited return...

I must start with an apology for taking so long from the last blog. I have shoulder problem that can only be described as weird. To quote the doctor, "I think I know what it is but it usually only happens to women over 80." I am awaiting a call to schedule an MRI. They think it is some weird bone growth. Julie, however, thinks that she has it figured out. She thinks that it is a bone disease that is just too lazy to move to the other bones. That might be true--as you know, I have found that the less I do, the less people really expect of me. After all, I have totally given up on being a good mother--I am sure that many things I do will have lasting damage on James. I won't think about that know, after all, tomorrow is another day. (and as God is my witness, I will never eat a root again.)
I went on my mission trip last week and got back sunday around noon. I am not going to ge into details--I will call you if you want them--but let me just say that kids are just not my cup of tea. They said that I would not even notice the not being able to bath thing, but they were dead wrong. That is why on friday afternoon, I broke down and washed my hair with some very yucky water. I am just very glad to be home. On a good note, the doctors that went saw about 175 patients.
Well, friday is the big day. We are going to Mallorca to see Phil's parents

I am sorry for any misspelling. My shoulder is killing me.

love me

Introducing...

Here is a little number I've had a lot of luck with. I hope you like it too.

FIBER
----Peggy Lee

Never knew how stopped I was up
Kept eating cheese all day
Till I put that brain inside me
That fiber did clear the way

Chorus
Oh, give me fiber
Bulk and roughage
Fiber cause I want to feel light
Fiber, in the morning
Fiber ‘fore we sleep at night

Incomplete evacuation
Make me feel so out of sorts
Feels like something died inside me
Time to try some water sports

Chorus
Oh give me fiber
Bulk and roughage
Fiber cause I want to feel light
Fiber, in the morning
Fiber ‘fore we sleep at night


Meats from yesteryear still bind us
Larded up and feeling blue
Spare me diverticulitis
Sweep me lord, through and through

Chorus
Oh give me fiber
Bulk and roughage
Fiber cause I want to feel light
Fiber, in the morning
Fiber ‘fore we sleep at night

Let me know if I have left anything out and I will fix it.

Tumbleweed Poetry Corner

And now, a Julie Jones original entitled "Julie's Desperation"

Cough, mumble, grumble, sigh.
Your mouth
Always in motion,
Never waiting for your brain.
Why can't you just shut up?

One Man's Demons...

Last night, at dinner, Phil looked over at the backdoor and then looked at me and said, "I can feel air coming in. I need to weather strip the door." I laughed and laughed...
MOTHER STUFF FIRST
Yesterday, I checked James' grades on line--online grade--well, his English/Language Arts grade is 62. Oh, the grammmar I have spouted to The Boy. Oh, the readings I have explained. I told him that it just hurt my heart. So, after seeing the grade, I emailed the teacher to see what I could do. She emailed me and you had better sit down for this because it is going to knock you right out of your comfort zone; she said, (and I quote) that he "tends to be a class clown and would rather make people laugh." It also seems that she has discussed this with him before. Well, I went home to chat with him and one of the arguments he had was that sometimes he does stuff and people don't always laugh. While that really did not hold up under scrutiny, I did have to appluad the effort he must have put into coming up with that. When he got out of the van this morning, he assured me he would keep his mouth shut in science--remember last week and talking--and that he would not try to make people laugh but would instead try and pay attention. Oh and he threw me this little chestnut--he said that if he did have homework or a test, he would try and remember to bring it home. He knows just how to touch my heart.
OTHER STUFF
I need to issue a formal apology. I did not realize that "I Want You to Want Me" was Cheap Trick. I hate that song; I hate Peter Frampton so I just thought that all things I hate must have a common source. Man, I am glad I got that off my chest. As you know, I live in Texas and have allergy problems. I no longer take my 4 shots a week for the problems, not because I got better but because I broke out in what can only be described as a full body hive. Well, I woke up this morning with a big headache--I have taken many many antihistamines and am feeling somewhat groggy. My friend Julie suggests booze for lunch. Man, she is my kind of friend--drunk!
Will--my boo--is reading over my sholder enjoying a piece of chocolate. And now the bear leaves...
Well, I guess I shall close here. I am, after all, at work and should really be using the time they pay me to play Mah Jong on the computer. Hope that you all have a wonderful day.

Each new day brings new hope...

Hello, a rainy monday morning and I am not at home. What is up with that? Well...My weekend brought some interesting things. On sunday, we went to the Sam's club. I went one way, Phil went another and James yet another. When we met back up, Phil had put an 8 bottle wine fridge in the buggy. I asked him just exactly how many fridges he thinks we need? After all, we have a regular size one in the kitchen and a tall skinny one in the garage for sodas etc and now apparently we need another to sit on the wet bar to just hold wine. And I don't want to hear anything about exact temperature control blah blah blah. Than he pointed out that there is one at his office and if he ever brings it home he is going to put it by his chair and keep beer in it. So evidently I have not been providing for all of his cold beverage needs. Jackass...and anybody can obviously see that he is suffering.

The boy got Guitar Hero this weekend. So, for a while I will have a break from "Smoke on the Water." Last night, I heard him play "I Want You to Want Me." I think that is that guy that I don't like--what is his name. Oh, Peter Frampton. I hate "Frampton comes alive." I guess that I shall close here. Thank you all so much for reading and commenting on what obviously witty things I have to write about. I do appreciate your attention. --S